Beleaguered Florida Governor Ron DeSantis has repeatedly made headlines over the past few years for his desperate, obvious, grasping attempts to court the Trump base of the Republican Party through a raft of wildly ill-advised and poorly conceived policies, many of which fly directly in the face of everything the MAGA Republicans stand for. His recent attempts to make Florida quasi-communist by trying to force a state takeover of Disney World—and ending up with little more than a few Disney jobs for his closest cronies and a massive pile of debt for the taxpayers–is a prime example of this.
The governor’s ill-fated foray into a magic kingdom of communism is eerily reminiscent of the bumbling escapades of the perennially-pantsless Disney doodle Donald Duck. Much like the feathered ne’er-do-well, DeSantis is known nationwide for his loud, silly voice and his buffoonish attempts to clumsily accomplish seemingly ordinary tasks that inevitably result in disastrous consequences. This time, however, there’s no happy ending. There is only embarrassment, frustration, and a few million taxpayer dollars in the pockets of the law firms he retained in the failed power move.
His pricey disaster highlights just how thoroughly incompetent DeSantis has been in leading the state of Florida and how he continually disregards the well-being of Main Street Floridians in his desperate quest to get his name in the national papers. It wasn’t the first time DeSantis has failed as Governor—far from it!–but it very well could be the last if he in fact chooses to pursue a run for the presidency against his former idol, Donald J. Trump. By Florida law, he would have to resign his position as Governor to run for the White House. This may be the best thing for Floridians, but it would be terrible for Republicans nationwide.
On top of the debacle with Disney, DeSantis has shown himself to only be a token and fleeting conservative, as he has taken drastic and unconstitutional steps such as forcing Florida into a heavy-handed lockdown that was far more economically damaging than the anti-COVID measures taken in New York and California; pushing a poorly-considered “Don’t Say Gay” bill that is written so generally that it would impose criminal penalties on even the most uncontroversial speech in a school, such as a teacher introducing themselves as “Mrs. Johnson”; and sending buses full of illegal immigrants to sanctuary cities in an attempt to get them fast-tracked for citizenship and voting for DeSantis in 2024.
Perhaps we should have seen it all coming; DeSantis ran for governor on a platform of unabashed Trump worship. He had zero policy ideas or actual political support. He saw that Trump was popular, and utterly debased himself to shamelessly attempt to align himself with Trump. He aired ads that proudly parroted the President’s greatest hits, including building a wall out of children’s blocks and tucking his kids in under a Trump flag. His wife proudly bragged about DeSantis’s admiration for Trump, calling him a “Bulldog Trump Defender.” It was a shameful display of true beta male cuck energy, but his pitiful groveling did eventually result in the former President’s endorsement. If Trump has a weakness, it’s certainly for flattery.
With Trump’s (tepid, to be honest) support, DeSantis rode the MAGA wave into office, but in his time in the Governor’s Mansion, the only things he has managed to “accomplish” have been empty gestures aimed solely at getting the least-informed conservatives to get so angry at imagined culture war issues that they abandon conservatism entirely. From his explosive attacks on free speech, to his mandate that ships illegal immigrants to sanctuary cities where they get fast-tracked for citizenship, and now his failed attempt to take over Disney, DeSantis’s actions are moving further and further away from the values he once touted.
It’s more than just these wild swings of the political pendulum that should make any voter reconsider DeSantis as a potential presidential candidate; it’s also his associations. DeSantis has been endorsed by George Soros, which should be an immediate disqualification for someone seeking the support of conservative Republicans, but I will go further. He is also part of Yale University’s infamous and highly secretive Skull and Bones fraternity, a dark secret society that is notorious for requiring its members to sexually violate a human corpse. Skull and Bones have many rich and politically connected members, including national embarrassment George W. Bush. DeSantis is also a devout Catholic, and as a member of that faith, he holds up the Pope as an infallible extension of God Himself. This should be a reminder that the governor’s loyalties will always be split, and the interests of the American people will never be his first priority. I want to stress that I hold no personal prejudices against anyone on the basis of their religion—I have several Catholic friends—but how can a person who thinks the head of state of another country is an infallible deity ever be trusted to put America First?
DeSantis failed remarkably in his attempt to turn Florida into a communist state; he ended up with a pile of debt for taxpayers and no pants.
This serves as a warning for the whole country: DeSantis is the Donald Duck of politics–flailing blindly with no regard for the security of the citizens or the consequences of his actions. This makes him an unsuitable choice for the highest office in the land.
Florida got lucky this time, but DeSantis’s pursuit of the sacred office of President may reap consequences far worse than a pile of debt. We simply can’t let our country dangle in the wind like Donald Duck’s feathered genitals to satisfy DeSantis’s political whims—there is too much at stake in this election. We need a leader that puts America first—and Ronald Duck is not it.